Illusion 的个人资料The Illusion of Life照片日志列表 工具 帮助

日志


1111

 

不过4个孤单的数字,被这个寂寞的世界赋予了孤单的含义。

©Hui.2007

流水

 

生日当晚看了郑秀文演唱会,次日是我侄儿的生日,华丽绚烂之后再度启程。然而频频在途中是可怕的,异族文化冲击下的不连贯片断之外,是无法安定的情绪扰攘,每次停留都不过驿站,生活在行李里展开,没有归属感。

 

在热带岛国请睽违六年的旧同事兼忘年交吃晚饭,她仍未离开那个化妆品王国,亦未见老去,而女儿已在澳洲完成大学课业转往美国。回想自己的经历,她感慨不已:我一直太顺利,只有记忆,没有回忆。幸福的无病呻吟。

 

洋人写了长长的EMAIL,字里行间充满愤怒,通篇文字竭尽颠倒黑白歪曲真相之能,这种让人瞠目结舌到羞于启齿的资质委实罕见,末了加注“此地无银三百两”式提醒:此事天知地知你知我知。所谓人无完人,可见得上天还是公平的,某方面缺失的能力总会在另一方面得以弥补,反之亦然。

 

近阶段我的受欢迎程度不亚于最当红艺人,不过为着我的几个职位空缺,“天下熙熙,皆为利来;天下攘攘,皆为利往”的人性便一览无遗。

 

看了删节版电影《色戒》,非常压抑,也就是我看张爱玲所有小说时的感觉。我不爱看小说,因为要经历其中太多的人生,这一篇小说虽短,我也从未看明白过,亦无从验证李安的解读是否张爱玲的本意。相形之下,我还是喜欢散文,散文之于小说于我,也就是音乐之于电影。

©Hui.2007

 

前天和同事出去吃午饭,附近只有两种选择,美式快餐或是中式套餐,结果二比一选了中式,而我是那个“一”。同事取笑我开始预习美国饮食好应对日后在那里的生活,也许潜意识里果真如此呢,虽然我连勉强拥戴美式食物都称不上。

 

昨天在哈根达斯(才发现身边充斥着美式店铺)抱着电脑等了一下午,终于从领馆取回了护照。回到陆家嘴,在ZARA小逛之后出来,夜上海已初露端倪,而这样美丽的夜色,要很久以后才能再见了。最近的这种情绪,与气温倒是契合的,或者根本就是与气温有关,天很凉了,记忆里此时的上海不该是如此的温度。地铁里有很大的广告,关于一本叫做“25ans”的杂志,中文译为“安”,其实那是法文的“25岁”。不过“安”这个名字还是挺讨人喜欢的。广告左侧是漾着招牌笑意的徐静蕾——我实在没法喜欢这个才女,她的字倒还是漂亮的,广告底部那一行:心安,美得!

 

今天JR求助一事:他在密歇根的邻居在浙江领养了一个女孩,只知道是dong shan bian的,不知道dong shan bian在哪里,花了很多钱去找,还是没找到那个地方。我Google了一下,似乎金华辖下兰溪市永昌街道东山边村比较契合,但一个拼音实在不足以确定什么,不过应该相距不远了吧!希望如此!

 

©Hui.2007

Proust Questionnaire

 

翻看很久以前的摘录时,重温了这两段非常有意思的Proust Questionnaire,只是我已忘了它们录自何处,但是Proust的回答很妙吧!如果是我们,会回答成什么样子呢?

 

·          What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery? To be separated from Mama

·          Where would you like to live? In the country of the ideal, or, rather, of my ideal

·          What is your idea of earthly happiness? To live in contact with those I love, with the beauties of nature, with a quantity of books and music, and to have, within easy distance, a French theater.

·          To what faults do you feel most indulgent? To a life deprived of the works of genius

·          Who are your favorite heroes of fiction? Those of romance and poetry, those who are the expression of an ideal rather than an imitation of the real

·          Who are your favorite characters in history? A mixture of Socrates, Pericles, Mahomet, Pliny the Younger and Augustin Thierry

·          Who are your favorite heroines in real life? A woman of genius leading an ordinary life

·          Who are your favorite heroines of fiction? Those who are more than women without ceasing to be womanly; everything that is tender, poetic, pure and in every way beautiful.

·          Your favorite painter? Meissonier

·          Your favorite musician? Mozart

·          The quality you most admire in a man? Intelligence, moral sense

·          The quality you most admire in a woman? Gentleness, naturalness, intelligence

·          Your favorite virtue? All virtues that are not limited to a sect: the universal virtues

·          Your favorite occupation? Reading, dreaming, and writing verse

·          Who would you have liked to be? Since the question does not arise, I prefer not to answer it. All the same, I should very much have liked to be Pliny the Younger.

 

      Seven years after the first questionnaire, Proust was asked, at another social event, to fill out another, the questions are much the same, but the answers somewhat different, indicative of his traits at 20:

 

·          Your most marked characteristic? A craving to be loved, or, to be more precise, to be caressed and spoiled rather than to be admired

·          The quality you most like in a man? Feminine charm

·          The quality you most like in a woman? A man's virtues, and frankness in friendship

·          What do you most value in your friends? Tenderness – provided they possess a physical charm which makes their tenderness worth having

·          What is your principle defect? Lack of understanding, weakness of will

·          What is your favorite occupation? Loving

·          What is your dream of happiness? Not, I fear, a very elevated one. I really haven't the courage to say what it is, and if I did I should probably destroy it by the mere fact of putting it into words

·          What to your mind would be the greatest of misfortunes? Never to have known my mother or my grandmother

·          What would you like to be? Myself – as those whom I admire would like me to be

·          In what country would you like to live? One where certain things that I want would be realized – and where feelings of tenderness would always be reciprocated [Proust's underlining]

·          What is your favorite color? Beauty lies not in colors but in their harmony

·          What is your favorite flower? Hers – but apart from that, all

·          What is your favorite bird? The swallow

·          Who are your favorite prose writers? At the moment, Anatole France and Pierre Loti

·          Who are your favorite poets? Baudelaire and Alfred de Vigny

·          Who is your favorite hero of fiction? Hamlet

·          Who are your favorite heroines of fiction? Phedre (crossed out) Berenice

·          Who are your favorite composers? Beethoven, Wagner, Schumann

·          Who are your favorite painters? Leonardo da Vinci, Rembrandt

·          Who are your heroes in real life? Monsieur Darlu, Monsieur Boutroux (professors)

·          Who are your favorite heroines of history? Cleopatra

·          What are your favorite names? I only have one at a time

·          What is it you most dislike? My own worst qualities

·          What historical figures do you most despise? I am not sufficiently educated to say

·          What event in military history do you most admire? My own enlistment as a volunteer!

·          What reform do you most admire? (no response)

·          What natural gift would you most like to posses? Will power and irresistible charm

·          How would you like to die? A better man than I am, and much beloved

·          What is your present state of mind? Annoyance at having to think about myself in order to answer these questions

·          To what faults do you feel most indulgent? Those that I understand

·          What is your motto? I prefer not to say, for fear it might bring me bad luck